How to survive long-haul flights with kids; Rules we always follow
1.Thou shalt plan, plan, plan
No more seat of your pants stuff, travellers. This is survival of the fittest. Pick your flight times carefully, book the best seating, book bassinets, check what your luggage limits are, book your kids meals in advance of your flight, pack thoughtfully and give yourself plenty of time to arrive at the airport and check-in.
2. Thou shalt have a seating strategy
I love an upgrade as much as the next passenger, but failing which, it’s likely to be cattle class so which seating combination do I want? Regardless of what you may think you’ve booked, the airline can always change this at check-in.
The earlier you arrive at the airport, the more flexibility the ground staff have in moving passengers around to meet your needs – be it sitting together, splitting your group into two rows, taking a spare seat between you or bagging the coveted bulkhead with the bassinet and legroom.
As your children (and family size) grow you will find your seating needs might change one year to the next.
3. Thou shalt exhaust thy offspring before flight
Kids have a lot of energy and it needs burning. For this reason, morning flights can be tough. If you’ve woken them up and gone straight to the airport all their beans are slowly building up inside and likely to explode by the time you get to the plane.
To the extent you can, let them run, climb and exhaust themselves before you board – sacrifice sipping on your latte in the lounge for some serious active time. You’ll thank me later.
4. Thou shalt travel through the night
I honestly believe this has been one of our greatest success factors in tackling long-haul. By being tired before boarding you significantly increase the chances of sleep during at least the first half of the flight.
Be warned, it can result in some children being overtired when they board and so the screeching commences along with ear pressure on take-off and you’re unable to do anything but clutch this wretched ball of fury, but remember, this too shall pass.
Give them the sleep queues before boarding, change nappies if needed, put pyjamas on bring favourite lovies and blankets and set the scene for sleep before the plane takes off. If there is fussing it will not last forever but you will maximize your chances of a restful flight while the cabin is dimmed.
5. Thou shalt befriend the cabin crew
Even if your fellow passengers detest you, always be friendly to the staff. They can make seating changes happen; they will remove the toilet lock to get your desperate toddler in; they will hold your baby while you pee or when you’ve hit wit’s end.
For the next 12 hours treat them like your nearest and only friend and they will hopefully take mercy. Note I am not suggesting you should use them as a babysitting service but if you’re polite they will take mercy on your plight.
6. Thou shalt recognise the signs
Kids become irritable usually due to tiredness, boredom or hunger so what can you do to placate these before they arise? Plan naps, bring activities and bring snacks.
Don’t rely on in-flight entertainment systems and plane meals alone to keep kids occupied and be prepared to get involved with them rather than trying to tune them out (that includes you Mr Globetrotter!)
7. Thou shalt save some surprises
Our kids know they will get their iPads after boarding and we build-up to the magic moment they can have them, making sure there’s something new and engaging loaded on to them.
Likewise, I always pack some new sticker and colouring books. Sure you can “wrap up these little surprises” but I can’t even find the time to wrap birthday presents – just make sure it’s something new and exciting, or a treat they aren’t normally allowed at home.
Save some for later in the flight when boredom hits or when they reach a milestone point in the flight, just be careful of over-packing.
8.Thou shalt teach respect
It is our job as parents to teach our children the rules and etiquette of air travel (basically sit still, quietly entertain yourself and endure!) Some absolute basics children should learn early on though include;
(i) no kicking the seat in front
(ii) don’t throw things
(iii) use your inside voice
(iv) jumping over chairs is not acceptable, and
(v) lying naked starfish in the aisle is out of the question
Just because you are at your wit’s end and sick and tired of the judgmental stares you are getting in the back of your head from every carefree unattached traveller within an eight-row radius, don’t let yourself collapse in a heap of self-pity.
In return I expect my fellow passengers to respect my child; cabin pressure can hurt their ears and they will occasionally cry, they will be a little fidgety and they do need to pee frequently, we all need to do our bit in the air on the manners front.
9. Thou shalt cuddle and reassure
If your child hasn’t flown before they may have anxieties, fear the unfamiliar location or become frustrated at the situation. Simply your attention and a cuddle can do the trick to calm them down. Putting your headphones on and hoping it will simply drown out the noise is tempting is not the answer. Kids crave attention, cuddles and reassurance, don’t deny them this.
10. Thou shalt not judge the drugger
I will state for the record I have never and have no intention to give my children any antihistamine based medicine to promote sleep. I know some parents swear by it and I can complete understand why.
This is up there with Formula vs Boob and Stay-at-home Mum vs Working Mum debates that haunt mummy forums world over.
I have a few more health facts on my website if you are interested in entering the debate further, but until you find yourself in this situation at 30,000 feet with no escape and a fading sense of hope DO NOT JUDGE your fellow travellers’ decisions.
Every flight we take brings a new experience, just when we pass one phase, another child enters the next bringing a new set of challenges to overcome. And just when we get the balance right I’m guessing we’ll be starting to pay for full price tickets.
This article was first published with Expat Essentials – the company behind Expat Essentials Relocation Guides. With summer fast approaching I have reproduced this guide for my readers to help those who must fly long-haul as a necessity cope with the journey ahead.
You may also be interested to read our tale of Surviving Ultra Long-Haul..With Kids – a blow by blow account of a trans-Atlantic adventure; over 16 hours on a plane with three kids under 5.
Over to you now, are there any commandments you live by?
Take me back to the flying with kids home page
© Our Globetrotters
A brilliant and insightful post – I totally agree with every point you made – especially the planning stage, and trying to fly through the night – it works much better particularly for toddlers. I wrote a similar post not that long ago after we flew on a 12-hour flight to Thailand – and I did use an antihistamine drug because my son is so hyper. I would never advocate it at home, but like you said being on a tin can for several hours warrants a different approach. It didn’t work anyway, so I won’t be using it again! Thanks so much for linking up with #MondayEscapes
Thanks for the #MondayEscapes linky! Some wonderful reading. So interesting to know the drugs didn’t work; I suspect if I ever tried my kids would be the ones to have the reverse effect!
Like you I’m a BIG believer in night flights. We’ve only ever had one where the kids didn’t sleep much but that was because the flight was hideously delayed and so by the time we left, it was almost time for the kids to wake up! My other golden rule is to always (always!) pack a change of clothes for young kids, and for yourself!
Too right Katja – never assume your past the stage where extra clothing is needed! Go the night flight!!!
Not sure how I didn’t comment!
Mine at the moment is Thou shalt babywear to keep them in one place.
Though still not sure how I’m going to do this with 2 on my own!!xx
If baby is still very small it’s physically possible but you’ll then need to go the wheelie bag option for luggage and no separate back pack for toddler toys – which isn’t necessarily a bad thing! Please ask a stranger to take a picture for you so you can report back – I am going to rely on my older two walking holding my hands and just carrying the bub in the front Ergo still (even though he’s on the move!) and a big back pack
Love this. Just started my own family travel blog and have been enjoying finding and reading others :).
Glad you have found us and welcome to the travel blog world!! I’ll be sure to come check you out too
Number 7 used to save us all the time. Now that I am with teens, chargers and charged phones (and adapters too) are mandatory. OH, and headphones… lots of them. Ours went missing or broke in Peru and we had kids sharing them!! Not a pretty thing. My list is a little less long as they have gotten older.
Yes too right! As you move up the age groups the gadgets become more essential! Luckily a lot of long-haul aircraft now have plugs for charging devices in flight, but spare headphones is also important – lost count of how many we’ve lost/snapped mid-air!
Great list! As my children are older now I will add: Thou shall not forget to fully charge the tablets before flying; thou shall fly north to south (or vice versa) as much as possible as opposed to east to west (or vice versa) to avoid thy dreaded jet lag…
The iPads! How could I forget that from this list!!